Thanksgiving With The Gunmen
by brutongaster32
Summary: Langly's cool hair, Frohike's cooking, and Byer's way of eating sauerkraut! What more could you want in a story? Oh, and there is some Fox, too.


**Thanksgiving With the Gunmen**

**Chapter 1- **

"Hey, Mulder! Come on in. Langly is just setting the table, and Frohike is cooking the turkey, mashed potatoes, sauerkraut, lima beans, stuffing, gravy, biscuits, sweet potatoes, and pumpkin pie," informed Byers.

"So, Frohike is the only one that can cook?" Mulder questioned.

"The only one that doesn't burn the quarters down when he turns on the stove or oven." Byers turned around and locked all the locks on the door.

"That's good. I hope he knows how to take the innards out of the turkey," Mulder said.

"Come in here, Mulder," Langly yelled from the kitchen. "Check to make sure he did it right!"

"I did it fine thank you very much, druggie," Frohike said to Langly.

"Ha, ha that's funny, Doohickey."

"Let me check it anyway," Mulder said to Frohike.

"You can check it when it comes out of the oven. Only five more minutes," Frohike remarked. He looked down into the oven to make sure the turkey was okay.

"Have a seat, Mulder. You can sit next to me," Byers said.

"I can help," Mulder started.

"No, Mulder, I am doing this by myself," Frohike declared. "Scully couldn't make it? Then I could have said, "Turkey is for dinner with a side of the scrumptious Scully." Mulder smiled and sat down next to Byers. Langly was across from him. The familiar room was actually cleaned for once. All the plastic plates had JFK's face on them.

"Soup's on," Frohike said. "Here is the turk-" Frohike cut off. "Oh, FART! Mulder I think I did this wrong!" Frohike thumped his hand against his head. The turkey was making popping noises and some of the innards came out onto the aluminum pan. They were bubbling.

"Doodoo, kaka, poopoo," Langly exclaimed. "I knew you had to take all that poop out of there!"

"Just leave it, Frohike. We have a lot of food already," Mulder announced.

"Hey, I don't like sauercrap like the rest of you! And those mocha crappuccinos are so gross, too," Frohike yelled. Frohike looked so mad, he could have had steam coming out of his ears.

"There is a whole bunch of stuff already. C'mon now," Byers said. "How about we order turkey sandwiches from a pizza place?"

"Works for me," Frohike stated suddenly looking happy again. "You guys in?"

"Sure," Mulder and Langly said at the same time.

"I'll call, you guys can start eating," Frohike said. He picked up their taped phone (the batteries fell out when it wasn't taped) and starting dialing the number.

"Hey, Frohike, can you please get me the Hershey bars?"

"Sure, Byers." Frohike opened a white painted cabinet above the stove and handed Byers two Hershey bars.

"What do you need them for?" Mulder questioned.

"I like to put sauerkraut on my chocolate. Actually, that is the only way I eat sauerkraut," Byers said matter-of-factly.

"That is what puts the "crap" in sauercrap," Frohike exclaimed. "Oh, yes, I would like to order four foot long turkey and cheese subs," Frohike said into the receiver of the phone. "Yes, I'll pick them up. Half an hour? Okay." Frohike hung up the phone and sat down starting to load his plate full of food. Mulder, Langly, and Byers were already stuffing their faces. Mulder had mashed potatoes and sweet potatoes covering his plate. Langly was ready to get seconds. Byers was eating slowly and had everything separated other than the overloaded chocolate bar.

"Byers, you have sauerkraut in your beard," Langly said disgustedly.

"You have sweet potatoes in your hair," Frohike informed Langly. Langly was swiping his hair and Byers was wiping his beard and putting more sauerkraut, sweet potatoes, and mashed potatoes on his chocolate.

"Byers, I'm not going to lie, but that is nasty," Mulder said.

"I've done it since I was a kid," Byers remarked. "The guys found out last year and they thought it was the weirdest thing they ever saw."

"It is the weirdest thing I have ever seen in my life right next to that dang Flukeman," Mulder reported. All of them started laughing. Langly was laughing so hard he almost fell out of his wooden chair.

"I better get going," Frohike said. "Sub time. Hey, has anyone seen my bulletproof vest?"

"No," Langly and Byers said at the same time. Langly looked like he was stifling giggles.

"You better hope no one shoots me," Frohike stated.


End file.
